MONDAY: OFFENSE
KEY PASSAGE
““Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother or sister who sins against me? Up to seven times?” Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.” Matthew 18:21-22 NIV
DEVOTIONAL
Have you ever been in a situation where someone did something or said something that truly and deeply offended you?
The truth is: Offense is the tip of the iceberg of unforgiveness in our lives. The offense may be on the surface, but underneath, bitterness, resentment and anger begin to take up the majority of the space in our hearts.
Anything we choose to keep in the dark is allowed to grow without our knowledge. In other words, we will never realize how big, strong, or dangerous something hidden in our hearts has grown until it is finally brought to light. The more we allow these things to grow without doing something about them, the greater the damage they can do to ourselves and our relationships.
We have an opportunity to release the effect of offense and stop it from growing to an unstable state. This opportunity comes by forgiveness as Christ forgave you. The offense may have happened in a moment, but the feelings that we allow to remain are a double-edged sword, causing damage to ourselves and to others.
CHALLENGE
BRING IT TO LIGHT: Take 5 minutes to ask the Holy Spirit, “What offense am I still holding on to today?” Write down what comes to mind. Bring it to light. What gets named can get dealt with.
RELEASE THE WEIGHT: Pray this difficult yet freeing prayer - “Jesus, I choose to forgive _________. I release all bitterness, anger, and resentment as I know it does not serve me or others. Help me to see the fruit of forgiveness, and renew my mind today. Amen.”
REPLACE THE ROOT: Do one act of kindness to someone today. Buy someone’s coffee, compliment your cashier, or even, if it is appropriate, do something kind towards that person who offended you in the past.
TUESDAY: JUDGING
KEY PASSAGE
‘“Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”” Luke 6:37-38 NIV
DEVOTIONAL
Have you ever heard the saying, “life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re going to get.” Forrest Gump truly carried wisdom unlike anyone else. However, I believe it can also be true that you CAN know what you will get in life. Examine your life simply through this thought: Am I living my life in a way that is reflective of Christ? If so, we will experience something called fruitfulness. If not, we will experience fruitlessness.
When we allow ourselves to fall into the trap of judging others based on their maturity, knowledge, personality, appearance, sin and many other things, we open the door into a very fruitless result. Judging others actually puts us into a role we are not fit for; a role only meant for God. As many people would understand, the moment you point a finger at someone else, should be the moment you realize there are four more fingers pointing right back at you.
When we live our lives realizing and recognizing that we are all a work in progress, always growing and always learning, we can see how unfruitful casting judgement is and how fruitful casting compassion is. Compassion is always better than criticism. Compassion recognizes that we are all loved by God and being worked on by Him, despite our shortcomings and imperfections.
CHALLENGE
PAUSE - Before jumping to a judgmental assumption today about someone, take 10 seconds to take the thought captive and ask, “Am I seeing this person through Christ’s eyes or the eyes of my own assumptions?”
REPLACE - When a judgmental thought has been captured, replace the assumption with another thought. Ex. “They might be carrying something I don’t understand”, “God loves them just like He loves me.”, “They may be in a place of deep hurt that needs healing.”
RESTORE - Give patience and understanding towards this person. Find a way to serve them if applicable. Or even simply ask the deeper question: Is there anything you need prayer for or support in?
WEDNESDAY: FREEDOM FROM ANGER & BITTERNESS
KEY PASSAGE
Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Ephesians 4:31-32
DEVOTIONAL
There is a park with tree covered walking trails in our local area that includes various ecosystems of the Eastern Shore of Maryland. In 2019, there was a big problem that needed to be addressed. Many of the trees and natural habitat had been overtaken and killed by an invasive plant called wisteria. It required a plan to cut and remove the wisteria vines so that the vines did not continue to destroy this beautiful park.
This invasive vine reminds me of how destructive bitterness can be in our lives. I’ve heard it said, “harboring bitterness is like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies. The more I feed bitterness in my heart, the more it brings death to me.”
In Ephesians 4, Paul is addressing the church of Ephesus and teaching them that with Jesus comes a new way of living: “put off your old self….and put on the new self” (vs.22-24). And one of the areas he is encouraging them to address is the area of bitterness. He says to get rid of it!
Bitterness is not something we are born with, but as we live life with people and experience hurt or are wronged, anger or even rage will come and if we are not careful, bitterness will take root in our lives. And if we feed the bitterness as we recite the wrong, it will grow just like the wisteria vines and damage and kill many other areas of our lives.
So, Paul tells us to get rid of it, but how do we do that? He gives us direction in Ephesians 4:32 “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as Christ Jesus forgave you.” He tells us to forgive the person in light of the forgiveness we have received from Christ.
CHALLENGE
Forgiveness is not about letting someone else go free; it’s about us finding freedom from carrying only what God can handle.
So today, I challenge you to:
1. Name the root of the hurt (any wrong-doing by someone else or yourself that has taken root in your heart).
2. Invite God into your hurt.
3. Repent and Release the hurt to God in prayer (forgive the person who has wronged you).
4. Seek Support from a brother or sister in Christ that can help you move forward.
THURSDAY: BOUNDARIES
KEY PASSAGE
“If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over. But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector.” Matthew 18:15-17
DEVOTIONAL
One day we were cleaning up our yard and came across a metal stake in the ground. At first glance we were not sure what it was, but on further investigation we realized that every corner of our yard had one of these metal stakes. The original owner had a surveyor map out the confines of the property and placed official boundary stakes to define the boundaries of the property.
Many people struggle with the concept of boundaries. We feel that boundaries stand opposed to God’s instructions because a boundary line is placed to keep people out of our lives. But boundaries are not put in place to keep people out, but to define personal space and to protect us from harm. In our relationships, boundaries are communicating our expectations and implementing consequences if those expectations are not met.
We see in our key scripture that Jesus gives clear instructions in how to deal with people who have wronged us or are behaving in ways that are unhelpful to our relationship. First, we must go to them discreetly and kindly, and point out their faults. If they do not listen and respond, then we must take one or two others with us to address it. If they still refuse to listen and respond we are told to treat them like a pagan or a tax collector, meaning put up boundaries to protect yourself from continued hurt with the hopes that the person will return and make things right with you.
We are required to forgive and let go of bitterness, but it does not mean that you have to let the person back in a place of trust in your life. Setting boundaries in your relationships is an act of stewardship over your own life, time, and energy, which honors God's design for your limitations.
CHALLENGE
Take a few minutes to gauge whether or not you have healthy boundaries in place in your life:
Is my relationship with my ___________ (spouse, friend, child, coworker) draining or life giving?
Can I communicate my limitations honestly without the fear of being punished or pushed away?
Am I suffering some of the consequences of someone else’s choices more than they are?
What are some of the limitations I can place on myself to keep this person from having full access to my limited emotional and physical resources?
What will the consequences be if the limits are ignored?
If you need help with establishing healthy boundaries, invite a trusted friend in or reach out to a Pastor.
FRIDAY: PEACE WITH ALL MEN
KEY PASSAGE
“But God disciplines us for our good, in order that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it. Therefore, strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees. “Make level paths for your feet,” so that the lame may not be disabled, but rather healed. Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord. See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.”
DEVOTIONAL
One of the reasons forgiveness is so difficult is because we forget that forgiveness is a GIFT and not a burden. Yes, forgiveness, especially extending forgiveness, is a difficult practice but God promises it is for our benefit— to produce righteousness, peace, strength, healing, and holiness in us. When we withhold forgiveness from others we forsake these gifts for a counterfeit version of peace and instead allow bitter roots to grow up to cause trouble.
This is why it is important to make every effort to live in peace with everyone, because not only are the gifts of righteousness, peace, strength, healing, and holiness for you, they are for everyone. God produces these things in you in order that no one falls short of His grace!
And I know what you’re thinking. “I can live at peace with most everyone, just not ______.” But this is the reality of extending forgiveness— it is your opportunity to lay the disappointment, bitterness, and revenge you feel entitled to at the feet of Jesus once and for all. To erase the records of wrong-doings and release your pain to say, “Jesus, you will do what is right with them better than I can.”
Romans 12:18-19 says:
“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: ‘It is mine to avenge; I will repay,’ says the Lord.”
God is not only a god of forgiveness, He is a god of justice. And He is asking you to exchange any un-forgiveness you have for His gifts of righteousness, peace, strength, healing and holiness. He is asking you to trust Him with the pain of your past to lead you into a better future.
CHALLENGE
As you have read about living at peace with everyone today, maybe a name came to mind of someone you have un-forgiveness towards. Take a moment to remember a time you received forgiveness from God. Ask God to help you imagine Him extending that same forgiveness to them, because He has. Ask God for the courage to release your un-forgiveness to Him, and to help you receive His righteousness, peace, strength, healing, and holiness in its place.